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From before | After this

Today's fuck-ass Tweets

Find me here: fapfapmofo



  • 07:32 @person0100 othanx #
  • 07:32 @dj_overdose I love gingers, though (don't bludgeon me) #
  • 09:43 ahhh another day, another t-rex on my cat. why is it under 20 degrees today? my feet are so cold :( #
  • 09:47 you cant slip just a quarter into a parking metre in toronto? ugh i don't HAVE any other change #
  • 09:56 none of the shops i want to go in are open :( dnw liquor, coffee, or childrens clothes I WANT BOOKS #
  • 09:56 and where was a post office? ih8u etobicoke (im at dundas and prince edward) #
  • 10:19 ugh i wish i could get @ replies on my phoooooone. also what does LASER HAIR & PHOTO FACIAL imply? wtf photo facial #
  • 10:42 what kind of book do i want? dinosaur? crafts? sci-fi? bedical thriller? true crime? #booklove #
  • 12:21 i know these are real bros: backed in on either side of my car, starbucks, and are discussing exhaust tips EW ICK GO AWAY YOU AREN'T PEOPLE #
  • 12:35 one bro is VERY CONCERNED about replacing his bed wheels. omg i want to sleep but there are bros :( #
  • 12:37 "juch" witf high school relic word, i forget what you meant (dirty juice?) #
  • 12:41 having trouble staying awake D: dnw to fall asleep right now. barely conscious #
  • 12:42 they finally left omg sleep here i come #brosaga #
  • 13:46 enzo and i just escorted a blind man into a tim hortons. why does that feel so good? he was supernice #
  • 14:56 go figure, the gap doesn't make bras in my size. THIS IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE DIFFICULT #
  • 14:58 i was hoping the dude at sephora would offer to put a face on me :3 i want a makeup counter face one day! #
  • 16:11 woman at the gap looked shocked when i told her i PLAY when im at the beach, i dont just lay around. wtf is wrong with females today? live! #
  • 16:38 wtf my EAR is sweaty? #
  • 17:11 dear really really round people with thin legs: leggings and high heels make you look like a peach on a stick. not a good look #
  • 17:34 all skirts should be made longer in the back, because most people have asses #
  • 17:39 jean/denim jackets: never, please. leave them in 1993 with gladiator sandals. who are you guys, my mom? #
  • 17:47 have i hit 2000 yet? i had 50 to go when i started today #
  • 17:53 @cuntymouth omg lol i have your address memorised (i think) #
  • 17:58 my teeth dont fit in my mouth i have HIPPO TEEF #
  • 17:59 also, bubble skirts make everywoman look like she has ultra-bad fupa #
  • 20:06 @meannejeanne It was totally supposed to say "medical thriller" oops, colour me extremely embarassed #
  • 20:07 @meannejeanne Oh and laser hair: it was on a sign. I merely tweeted the name of the shop. t means "laser hair removal", ut I want laser hair #
  • 20:23 @meannejeanne I should have asked for laser hair for my birthday last week :( #
  • 20:53 Why is ONTD on the LJ homepage as if everyone should read it? FUCK OFF, YOU ARE A DUMB COMMUNITY. Also, wtf July 4 stuff, are we skipping 1? #
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seriously, so many hilarious tweets today! the ones about the bros, especially, crack me up